The Pain of it All

Heel Spurs - first thing I feel when I get out of bed. It takes a minute to walk right.

feet pain - constantly top and bottom

Knees - walking up OR down steps, standing after sitting too long, walking for a while, hurts.

back ache - after walking a short distance or sitting too long

ankle swelling - after sitting for too long my ankles swell to the size of grapefruits at times

leg swelling - after stilling for too long my lower legs (calves) are rock hard swollen

ibrophen is my best friend.

I'm not going to complain about here cuz its my own fault. I did this to myself....Nobody did it for me. I control what I put in my mouth. My whole life I've been fat/obese. You would think I like living like this. Maybe I do. I know I don't. Who would want to live with so much pain??

I rejoined weight watchers again tonight. Its been a very emotional day for me all around. I sat there at the meeting....Last chair, last row, feeling very alone. alone with my thoughts. Its been a rough day all around with Sarah leaving for college , so I sat there fighting my tears. One, because she's gone and two because I'm here again. Here where I swore I would never be again. I did this too me.

I couldn't believe the number that came up on the scale. I can't even fix my fingers to type it.

so I have a long journey ahead.